Dad went to Loyola yesterday to begin more chemotherapy. He is still fighting off the MRSA infection and now is fighting a stomach/intestinal infection as well. The discouraging news is that they did NOT begin administering chemotherapy as planned. The reason is because it is no longer effective. Doctors tell him there is no hope down that path. Thankfully, there is a clinical study out there that he may be a candidate for. We are still waiting for more information. Please pray that God will continue to provide dad with physical and emotional strength through this battle. Additionally, the prayer is that he will be a candidate for this study and that it would be effective.
As I got into the van the other day, Rod had WMBI on. The program was talking about Philippians 4:6-7. "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." I only heard a few seconds of what the man was saying about it as I wasn't driving far. What he said stuck with me as simple as it was. Don't worry about ANYTHING but pray about EVERYTHING. I just need to keep giving it to God and his peace will help me through the day.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Monday, October 15, 2007
Stopping to "Smell the Flowers"
We celebrated Jaycie's 2nd birthday this Saturday. She turns 2 on Wednesday. As I look back over the years, it seems like time flies by so fast and I simply do not take time to "smell the flowers" enough. She is starting to say many new words (like "mine") and wants to do everything her big sister does.
It's funny how much a 2-year-old can understand. All day long she was asking for Papa and Gaga (my parents). I tried to explain to her that they wouldn't be coming as Dad is now fighting a stomach/intenstinal infection on top of everything else. It was likely more for the prevention of my own disappointment rather then hers that I informed her of their absence. Even still, as the doorbell rang, Jaycie asked, "Papa? Gaga?".
Her Great-Grandparents gave her a Curious George that tumbles as you push his head forward. Her Auntie Rhonda gave her some new silver shoes that Jaycie had to put on immediately enjoying the noise they made clonking on the wood floor. Her little friend Natalie gave her a Cabbage Patch baby that we couldn't get out of the package fast enough for her to hug. Yet, once again, the best present was simply the presence of my parents.
The older I get, the more I appreciate shared moments and quality time. Memory making is big for me. I scrapbook, snap photos and take videos quite often so memories can be documented. This celebration is one more moment that I am reminded to cherish. Every moment God gives me with those I love is a gift.
The Friday preceding her party, I was informed that Dad was not doing well. Because of my personality, it was really disturbing to me that we would have this party without my parents there. I also couldn't stop thinking about all the other memory-making moments coming upon us as the holidays approach. My emotions were so out-of-whack that I didn't even want to prepare for Jaycie's party -- and I had a whole lot to do. I shared this feeling with a couple of friends who informed me they would be praying. At the end of the day, God had given me enough peace of mind to get done what had to be done. I do not want my girls to miss out on life as I struggle with thoughts of what if's in the future.
If I think about the future, fear and worry can overwhelm me. When I allow God to handle the future and ask him for the peace and strength to help me live for today, I am able to "smell the flowers" more often.
"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" -- Matthew 6:27
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, presnet your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." -- Philippians 4:6-7
It's funny how much a 2-year-old can understand. All day long she was asking for Papa and Gaga (my parents). I tried to explain to her that they wouldn't be coming as Dad is now fighting a stomach/intenstinal infection on top of everything else. It was likely more for the prevention of my own disappointment rather then hers that I informed her of their absence. Even still, as the doorbell rang, Jaycie asked, "Papa? Gaga?".
Her Great-Grandparents gave her a Curious George that tumbles as you push his head forward. Her Auntie Rhonda gave her some new silver shoes that Jaycie had to put on immediately enjoying the noise they made clonking on the wood floor. Her little friend Natalie gave her a Cabbage Patch baby that we couldn't get out of the package fast enough for her to hug. Yet, once again, the best present was simply the presence of my parents.
The older I get, the more I appreciate shared moments and quality time. Memory making is big for me. I scrapbook, snap photos and take videos quite often so memories can be documented. This celebration is one more moment that I am reminded to cherish. Every moment God gives me with those I love is a gift.
The Friday preceding her party, I was informed that Dad was not doing well. Because of my personality, it was really disturbing to me that we would have this party without my parents there. I also couldn't stop thinking about all the other memory-making moments coming upon us as the holidays approach. My emotions were so out-of-whack that I didn't even want to prepare for Jaycie's party -- and I had a whole lot to do. I shared this feeling with a couple of friends who informed me they would be praying. At the end of the day, God had given me enough peace of mind to get done what had to be done. I do not want my girls to miss out on life as I struggle with thoughts of what if's in the future.
If I think about the future, fear and worry can overwhelm me. When I allow God to handle the future and ask him for the peace and strength to help me live for today, I am able to "smell the flowers" more often.
"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" -- Matthew 6:27
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, presnet your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." -- Philippians 4:6-7
Friday, October 12, 2007
A confession
One hot summer day when Nikelle was just a year old, I put her to sleep without her blankets. I just assumed that it was too hot and that she’d fall asleep as usual. That was a big mistake! She cried and cried until I realized what was wrong and gave her those precious blankies! Since then, she has slept with them just about every night as well as at naptime.
Jaycie has simply followed suit. I just assumed that it was because her sister sleeps with two blankies that Jaycie thinks it’s important to have her own. Honestly, it wasn’t something I really gave much thought until earlier this week.
I have a quilt that my Grandma handmade for me when I was a teenager. She crafted it out of old scraps of material; some of which were from dresses my Mom had made me. I've had it since I was about 15-years-old and sleep with it every night. I even take it on trips with me.
When Rod and I first got our dog, she decided to pull part of this quilt through her cage and tore holes in it. When I informed my grandma, she suggested that I just sew some patches over these holes with some type of puppy fabric. So, to be more specific, I have a patchwork quilt.
After the entire marathon debacle, Rod and I stayed in Chicago at a hotel with the girls overnight. We thought we would have some quality family time. Along with everything else that weekend, it did not go as planned.
When we left the City, I was quite relieved. I was looking forward to getting home and getting some rest. We stopped at my parents’ house to visit my dad and Rod mowed their lawn. He was really in overdrive and decided to mow his parents’ lawn as well. We didn’t get home until close to 9 p.m.
It was at this point that I realized I had left my blanket and pillow in our hotel room! I broke down. Nothing – absolutely nothing went according to plan that weekend. I was exhausted and every emotion I’ve allowed to build up inside of me flowed out. (A more accurate description would probably be portrayed if I used the word “erupted” but that’s beside the point.) I could not imagine how a huge hotel like the Hyatt Regency Chicago would keep track of a worn out pillow and blanket but Rod made some phone calls in pursuit anyhow. (Did I mention one of Nike’s blankets was with my quilt as well?)
Late Tuesday morning I received a call informing me “they had good news” and I drove to downtown Chicago (on my own – quite the accomplishment) to retrieve my blanket. Every negative emotion I had towards that hotel was gone. It didn’t matter that I was charged money for phone calls and parking for which we would have made better choices had we been more informed. The fact that I had to share my room with my sister-in-law and brother the night before the marathon because they could not find her room was no longer an issue. They found my blankie and, in one moment, something seemed right in the world.
So, that’s my confession. I have a blankie that I’m obviously quite attached to. I also now understand why my girls are so attached to their blankets. They simply follow in their Mommy’s footsteps.
Jaycie has simply followed suit. I just assumed that it was because her sister sleeps with two blankies that Jaycie thinks it’s important to have her own. Honestly, it wasn’t something I really gave much thought until earlier this week.
I have a quilt that my Grandma handmade for me when I was a teenager. She crafted it out of old scraps of material; some of which were from dresses my Mom had made me. I've had it since I was about 15-years-old and sleep with it every night. I even take it on trips with me.
When Rod and I first got our dog, she decided to pull part of this quilt through her cage and tore holes in it. When I informed my grandma, she suggested that I just sew some patches over these holes with some type of puppy fabric. So, to be more specific, I have a patchwork quilt.
After the entire marathon debacle, Rod and I stayed in Chicago at a hotel with the girls overnight. We thought we would have some quality family time. Along with everything else that weekend, it did not go as planned.
When we left the City, I was quite relieved. I was looking forward to getting home and getting some rest. We stopped at my parents’ house to visit my dad and Rod mowed their lawn. He was really in overdrive and decided to mow his parents’ lawn as well. We didn’t get home until close to 9 p.m.
It was at this point that I realized I had left my blanket and pillow in our hotel room! I broke down. Nothing – absolutely nothing went according to plan that weekend. I was exhausted and every emotion I’ve allowed to build up inside of me flowed out. (A more accurate description would probably be portrayed if I used the word “erupted” but that’s beside the point.) I could not imagine how a huge hotel like the Hyatt Regency Chicago would keep track of a worn out pillow and blanket but Rod made some phone calls in pursuit anyhow. (Did I mention one of Nike’s blankets was with my quilt as well?)
Late Tuesday morning I received a call informing me “they had good news” and I drove to downtown Chicago (on my own – quite the accomplishment) to retrieve my blanket. Every negative emotion I had towards that hotel was gone. It didn’t matter that I was charged money for phone calls and parking for which we would have made better choices had we been more informed. The fact that I had to share my room with my sister-in-law and brother the night before the marathon because they could not find her room was no longer an issue. They found my blankie and, in one moment, something seemed right in the world.
So, that’s my confession. I have a blankie that I’m obviously quite attached to. I also now understand why my girls are so attached to their blankets. They simply follow in their Mommy’s footsteps.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
UNFINISHED BUSINESS
Fiona and I are obsessed with thinking about how we can complete the 26.2 miles we have trained so hard for. We have decided to participate in the Indianapolis Marathon on Saturday, October 20th. The experience of our family cheering us on will not be present but we will have the personal satisfaction of achieving goals we had set for ourselves.
Running/walking is addictive. It’s something I picked up back in 2004 and I love the high after a good run or even a run/walk. We practice a run/walk strategy of 6 minutes running: 2 minutes walking. This has been a very effective strategy thus far and will hopefully carry us across the finish line in Indianapolis.
Only God knows what kind of weather we will have but I’d almost bet there won’t be a 90* heat index this time!
Running/walking is addictive. It’s something I picked up back in 2004 and I love the high after a good run or even a run/walk. We practice a run/walk strategy of 6 minutes running: 2 minutes walking. This has been a very effective strategy thus far and will hopefully carry us across the finish line in Indianapolis.
Only God knows what kind of weather we will have but I’d almost bet there won’t be a 90* heat index this time!
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
A Historical Marathon
For months, I have been training for the LaSalle Bank Chicago Marathon with the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society’s Team in Training. I was running in honor of my dad who is fighting against lymphoma for his life as well as for my father-in-law who is battling leukemia. Our coaches with Team in Training were incredible. I was very prepared for race day and was informed as to what I should do to equip me to cross the finish line at mile 26.2.
I was astonished just after the half way mark to be informed that they were cutting miles off the course only to be quickly followed up by the cancellation of the race. I was highly disappointed because I was utilizing a run/walk strategy to get me to the finish line. Although conditions were rough, I felt hydrated and energized. I was looking forward to the moment where I would cross the finish line for both my dads.
The beginning of the race was tremendous. Intentionally, we started at the back of the pack to avoid the crowd as much as possible. Being cheered on by people we don’t even know was an incredible experience. As we ran under the first viaduct, we read a banner hanging up reading “You Inspire”. This was not just for my dads, it was also a personal goal I had made and looked forward to finishing.
It was exciting to have my brother and some of their friends at the starting line. Soon into the race, I was cheered on by one of my very best friends and her husband who had made a day of it in the City for me. As we turned one corner on the course, I heard my sister and her family shouting our names. My husband’s sister was cheering me on later in the race as well as his cousin and her husband. This is where my marathon experience was cut short. The course was cut off and we were instructed to walk – not run with the masses back to Grant Park. Thankfully, this was the point where Rod and Nikelle were there to cheer me on. And still, I knew others were at longer miles offering their support. I also knew my in-laws were back near the finish line with Jaycie.
As we were corralled down Jackson Street, the water hydrants were blasting us. This action would have really been welcomed much earlier in the race as the first water station we came upon left us empty. Tables were overturned; littered cups and wet pavement left only signs of the liquids we were hoping for. Thankfully, our coaches had impressed upon us the importance of running with water packs. We tried to tell ourselves that this was a fluke and pressed on hoping the next water stop would be equipped. My sister-in-law, Fiona, who shared this experience with me had her cell phone on her and called my brother to meet us with water at the next point we would see them to be certain we had some fluids.
We continued on reminding ourselves of our reason for persevering. Near Lincoln Park Zoo, we came upon a fountain where we dipped our hats and doused our heads as we kept on. Again, as we approached Wrigleyville, a fountain offered the same experience. We were instructed by a friend of Fiona’s (who runs marathons) early in the race to accept ice from spectators and place it inside our hats to cool us down (not to mention using it to cool off any other place of our body we could). It was so greatly appreciated to have spectators spraying hoses, offering ice and water bottles and cheering us on. It was an incredible experience for what we were allowed to complete.
Tears streamed down my face as I realized I would not have a finish line experience I had dreamed of for many days. However, I had told my dad that I would cross the finish line. At least they allowed us to do that (although the mileage was not even as long as our longest training). I told myself that I was part of a historical marathon. I told myself that funds were still raised and that, after all, was my purpose for beginning this marathon in the first place.
I was unaware of just how many sirens were sounding during the race. I was really oblivious to how many people were dropping due to the heat and I certainly had no idea of the tragedy that occurred for one family. As I walked towards the finish line with my sister-in-law, I realized that it was a wise decision to call the race. It didn’t relieve the frustration in my heart. Although, in my head, I knew it was important. I began to hear all the sirens and see people puking and laying on the sidelines. Even as we were trying to make our way to Charity Village to meet family, a spotter yelled into is megaphone “Runner down. Runner down.” There were simply not enough medics to keep up with the overheated runners.
As we came upon the Team in Training tent in Charity Village, family and friends were there to greet us. Although this was not the finish line memory I was hoping for, I told myself that I still had so much to be thankful for.
The news that night revealed the information about the death of the 35-year-old husband and father from Michigan. No wonder the race was cancelled. As I went to sleep Sunday night, I was grateful to be with my husband and daughters.
I know the conditions were serious and many had their health at stake, not to mention a life. Even still, my emotions are still conflicting as the moment I worked so hard for was stolen from me. As I still long for that finish line experience, I will continue on as an endurance athlete and one day complete those 26.2 miles.
I was astonished just after the half way mark to be informed that they were cutting miles off the course only to be quickly followed up by the cancellation of the race. I was highly disappointed because I was utilizing a run/walk strategy to get me to the finish line. Although conditions were rough, I felt hydrated and energized. I was looking forward to the moment where I would cross the finish line for both my dads.
The beginning of the race was tremendous. Intentionally, we started at the back of the pack to avoid the crowd as much as possible. Being cheered on by people we don’t even know was an incredible experience. As we ran under the first viaduct, we read a banner hanging up reading “You Inspire”. This was not just for my dads, it was also a personal goal I had made and looked forward to finishing.
It was exciting to have my brother and some of their friends at the starting line. Soon into the race, I was cheered on by one of my very best friends and her husband who had made a day of it in the City for me. As we turned one corner on the course, I heard my sister and her family shouting our names. My husband’s sister was cheering me on later in the race as well as his cousin and her husband. This is where my marathon experience was cut short. The course was cut off and we were instructed to walk – not run with the masses back to Grant Park. Thankfully, this was the point where Rod and Nikelle were there to cheer me on. And still, I knew others were at longer miles offering their support. I also knew my in-laws were back near the finish line with Jaycie.
As we were corralled down Jackson Street, the water hydrants were blasting us. This action would have really been welcomed much earlier in the race as the first water station we came upon left us empty. Tables were overturned; littered cups and wet pavement left only signs of the liquids we were hoping for. Thankfully, our coaches had impressed upon us the importance of running with water packs. We tried to tell ourselves that this was a fluke and pressed on hoping the next water stop would be equipped. My sister-in-law, Fiona, who shared this experience with me had her cell phone on her and called my brother to meet us with water at the next point we would see them to be certain we had some fluids.
We continued on reminding ourselves of our reason for persevering. Near Lincoln Park Zoo, we came upon a fountain where we dipped our hats and doused our heads as we kept on. Again, as we approached Wrigleyville, a fountain offered the same experience. We were instructed by a friend of Fiona’s (who runs marathons) early in the race to accept ice from spectators and place it inside our hats to cool us down (not to mention using it to cool off any other place of our body we could). It was so greatly appreciated to have spectators spraying hoses, offering ice and water bottles and cheering us on. It was an incredible experience for what we were allowed to complete.
Tears streamed down my face as I realized I would not have a finish line experience I had dreamed of for many days. However, I had told my dad that I would cross the finish line. At least they allowed us to do that (although the mileage was not even as long as our longest training). I told myself that I was part of a historical marathon. I told myself that funds were still raised and that, after all, was my purpose for beginning this marathon in the first place.
I was unaware of just how many sirens were sounding during the race. I was really oblivious to how many people were dropping due to the heat and I certainly had no idea of the tragedy that occurred for one family. As I walked towards the finish line with my sister-in-law, I realized that it was a wise decision to call the race. It didn’t relieve the frustration in my heart. Although, in my head, I knew it was important. I began to hear all the sirens and see people puking and laying on the sidelines. Even as we were trying to make our way to Charity Village to meet family, a spotter yelled into is megaphone “Runner down. Runner down.” There were simply not enough medics to keep up with the overheated runners.
As we came upon the Team in Training tent in Charity Village, family and friends were there to greet us. Although this was not the finish line memory I was hoping for, I told myself that I still had so much to be thankful for.
The news that night revealed the information about the death of the 35-year-old husband and father from Michigan. No wonder the race was cancelled. As I went to sleep Sunday night, I was grateful to be with my husband and daughters.
I know the conditions were serious and many had their health at stake, not to mention a life. Even still, my emotions are still conflicting as the moment I worked so hard for was stolen from me. As I still long for that finish line experience, I will continue on as an endurance athlete and one day complete those 26.2 miles.
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