My past couple of mornings have gone somewhat like this:
5am - Ande wakes up and needs to eat and goes back to sleep
5:30am - I decide there is really a good 1/2 hour to 45 minutes left of sleep before I need to wake Nikelle and crawl back in bed
6:14 am - I convince myself that I really need to get out of bed
6:15 am - Wake Nikelle up and make certain she gets ready for the day
6:30 am - Hop in the shower
6:50 am - Instruct Nikelle to get her shoes on
7:00 am - Nike waves goodbye to Rod and Ande wakes up
7:02 am - Attempt to get out the door
7:03 am - Jaycie wakes up and needs to go potty
7:05 am - Have Nike watch to make certain we don't miss the bus
7:10 am - Get out the door with the girls
7:12 am - Bus arrives at the corner as we are only halfway there (not a long walk either!)
7:12 am - Run!
7:12 am - Bus Monitor gets off bus to meet us and take Nikelle to the bus
7:13 am - Wave goodbye and head back to the house
7:15 am - Get breakfast for Jaycie; Feed Ande
7:20 am - Take a deep breath
The last two days were a rough start to the morning. Getting Nikelle to the bus on time was a struggle. We are supposed to be to her bus stop ten minutes prior to her pick up time. Needless to say, the bus was two minutes early the past two days as I tried to push my luck. Thankfully, there is a bus monitor on the bus who is very helpful. Both days she came and met me so that I didn't have to run with Nikelle. She advised me that if she sees me coming, she'll come take Nike and not to worry about it. I apologized and expressed my gratitude.
Today I was determined to get to the bus stop on time. We were out there and waiting for the bus to arrive. I have to say this was due to my husband's help prior to leaving for work. It never fails that the two little ones wake up shortly before leaving to take their sister to the bus and completely throw off my schedule. (I will sometimes leave them sleeping as I just run down the street and back.)
In my determination today, however, I made certain (with Rod's help) all three girls were up and ready to get to the bus stop. Thankfully the weather has been nice. Next week as the true fall weather hits, I'll need to think my morning again. Today, however, my deep breath was able to come a little sooner.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Got Firewood?
Just thought I'd mention that if there is anyone out there looking to get rid of some firewood or knows of anyone looking to get rid of some firewood, we could use it. My parents' house is heated with woodburning stoves. Dad mentioned at the end of his life that he built the house for a healthy him. He never thought about it becoming a problem...until he got sick. He was always able to find firewood and cut down trees to heat the house for the winter. Now Mom faces the winter in need of wood. We have some but are looking for more. If you have any or know of anyone, please let me know. Thanks!
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Dad and the Harvest
My heart tugs in all kinds of directions this time of year. Initially, as the leaves start to change colors and fall from the trees, my heart warms. This is one of the best times of the year! Brisk air. The smell of Autumn. Thanksgiving. My birthday. Sweet potatoes. Pumpkin pie. The harvest.
We have always brought in the pumpkins, gourds, squash and ornamental corn this time of year. We'd make a point of heading over to Mom & Dad's with the kids at a time that Dad could harvest with the kids. He enjoyed showing the beautiful colors of corn to the kids. They'd guess what colors there would be and then the reveal: purple; red; rainbow; as well as the spooky looking ones. We have some of this on video which will help us to remember. This tugs my heart in a different direction. Fond memories which follow with heartache that Ande will never experience this and Jaycie didn't have the opportunity either.
Last year we harvested without Dad with hope that he'd be around for future harvests. I have Nike and Maty talking to Papa on video telling him they love him and want him to get better soon so he can pick the corn with them. I'm not even sure if I ever showed him the video.
This year we intend to harvest whatever there is. Mom did plant again this year for numerous reasons but with everything going on, we haven't been able to help her as much as we should have. Dad was the one that loved to garden. He took pride in his garden. He enjoyed every bite of what came out of it as well as just the appeal the harvest had for the eyes.
Dad didn't like to have a meal served without his vegetables. I'd say vegetables were often the main course. Dad would take his salt shaker out to the garden, pick a tomato and eat it like an apple. The memories flood as I recall Dad in his garden.
Eating fresh sweet corn this year... and green beans... there was an enjoyable taste that left my heart tugging in different directions. I found myself reaching for another ear of corn... not because I was still hungry... simply because Dad would have a pile of empty ears with a meal and I knew if he was still here, I'd be letting him down to stop at one ear of corn.
Will the pain ever stop? We have to be intentional not to allow ourselves to fall into a pit of grief that we have to climb out of. I find myself literally shaking my head often. It's as though I'm telling myself I can't go there. I have to remember the good times and be grateful for what we have. It doesn't do any good to delve into my wishes for the future that can never be fulfilled.
Still, pain is part of this process. Grief is a part of my life. It's a daily learning process to live with it and in spite of it.
Recording and sharing memories of Dad helps medicate my heart. It keeps his memory alive and reminds me of how blessed we were to call this man "Dad" or "Papa".
We have always brought in the pumpkins, gourds, squash and ornamental corn this time of year. We'd make a point of heading over to Mom & Dad's with the kids at a time that Dad could harvest with the kids. He enjoyed showing the beautiful colors of corn to the kids. They'd guess what colors there would be and then the reveal: purple; red; rainbow; as well as the spooky looking ones. We have some of this on video which will help us to remember. This tugs my heart in a different direction. Fond memories which follow with heartache that Ande will never experience this and Jaycie didn't have the opportunity either.
Last year we harvested without Dad with hope that he'd be around for future harvests. I have Nike and Maty talking to Papa on video telling him they love him and want him to get better soon so he can pick the corn with them. I'm not even sure if I ever showed him the video.
This year we intend to harvest whatever there is. Mom did plant again this year for numerous reasons but with everything going on, we haven't been able to help her as much as we should have. Dad was the one that loved to garden. He took pride in his garden. He enjoyed every bite of what came out of it as well as just the appeal the harvest had for the eyes.
Dad didn't like to have a meal served without his vegetables. I'd say vegetables were often the main course. Dad would take his salt shaker out to the garden, pick a tomato and eat it like an apple. The memories flood as I recall Dad in his garden.
Eating fresh sweet corn this year... and green beans... there was an enjoyable taste that left my heart tugging in different directions. I found myself reaching for another ear of corn... not because I was still hungry... simply because Dad would have a pile of empty ears with a meal and I knew if he was still here, I'd be letting him down to stop at one ear of corn.
Will the pain ever stop? We have to be intentional not to allow ourselves to fall into a pit of grief that we have to climb out of. I find myself literally shaking my head often. It's as though I'm telling myself I can't go there. I have to remember the good times and be grateful for what we have. It doesn't do any good to delve into my wishes for the future that can never be fulfilled.
Still, pain is part of this process. Grief is a part of my life. It's a daily learning process to live with it and in spite of it.
Recording and sharing memories of Dad helps medicate my heart. It keeps his memory alive and reminds me of how blessed we were to call this man "Dad" or "Papa".
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Trick or Treat, Smell my Feet
Trick or Treat
Smell my feet
Give me something good to eat
If you don't, I don't care
I'll just pull down your underwear
This is what Nikelle came home having learned on the bus today. I know everyone learns this little rhyme at some point in their life. It's just a silly little rhyme. Still, I hate that she is growing up. I hate that little by little, she is losing her innocence. I want to keep her young and naive for as long as possible. Thankfully, this is mild in comparison to what she could be learning on the bus. Still, I have to stress to her that although it's a funny little jingle that she can use at home, it is not something nice to say when she is out trick-or-treating. We'll see if she remembers this when Halloween rolls around.
I may not be able to protect her from everything. She is out in the world and she's bound to learn things I don't want her to learn. I just pray that we always have a relationship where she will share with me what she is learning. I want to guide her in a way that doesn't feel condemning when she talks with me but rather allows her to continue to feel welcome to share, all the while learning to make right choices.
Any input?
Smell my feet
Give me something good to eat
If you don't, I don't care
I'll just pull down your underwear
This is what Nikelle came home having learned on the bus today. I know everyone learns this little rhyme at some point in their life. It's just a silly little rhyme. Still, I hate that she is growing up. I hate that little by little, she is losing her innocence. I want to keep her young and naive for as long as possible. Thankfully, this is mild in comparison to what she could be learning on the bus. Still, I have to stress to her that although it's a funny little jingle that she can use at home, it is not something nice to say when she is out trick-or-treating. We'll see if she remembers this when Halloween rolls around.
I may not be able to protect her from everything. She is out in the world and she's bound to learn things I don't want her to learn. I just pray that we always have a relationship where she will share with me what she is learning. I want to guide her in a way that doesn't feel condemning when she talks with me but rather allows her to continue to feel welcome to share, all the while learning to make right choices.
Any input?
Potty Training
My mind has been bouncing around doing a post on how well Jaycie has been doing with potty training. I've been hesitant because I fear that it will be followed up with her having all kinds of problems. Now that I don't have to worry about that anymore, I'll just give an update on her potty training.
She's been doing great. I can't remember the last time she messed in her pants. That's a relief. If we're going to have accidents, I'd rather they be the easier ones to clean up. She's been consistently wearing panties during the day. I've even begun to allow her to wear them when we're going out. She's been doing that well with telling me she has to go.
Yesterday my mom and I went out to run some errands. We were near the mall and it was time for Andelise to eat. I decided it would be nice for Jaycie if she could play at the playplace while Ande ate.
Jaycie was enjoying playing because nobody was at the playplace (the more kids, the more shy she decides she is). I wasn't really thinking about how long it had been since I had her go to the bathroom last until I saw her standing there with liquid forming underneath her! She stopped going when I told her to and my mom cleaned things up and took her to the bathroom. I blamed it partly on myself because I didn't have her go to the bathroom prior to playing.
Later in the day, she was playing outside and told me she needed to come in and go potty. I thought to myself about the progress that revealed. That's when I realized she went up to her bedroom and got new panties for herself. She had had an accident outside. I suppose if she's going to have an accident, that's the best place for it.
All these accidents seem to happen during the baby's feedings. I need to do a better job of making sure she's been to the bathroom in the recent past before I feed the baby. Especially because she had another accident after Nikelle got home. Again, while I was feeding her sister.
I was sitting with Ande when Nikelle came up to me and said, "I think Jaycie had an accident." I put the baby down and went to the bathroom where the floor was soaked. When I asked Jaycie why she didn't tell me, her response was simply "I just wet."
After informing my daughter that there would be no more candy while she was having accidents during the day, she did better to this point. I
Thinking about it, t's been a while since she's been to the bathroom...
She's been doing great. I can't remember the last time she messed in her pants. That's a relief. If we're going to have accidents, I'd rather they be the easier ones to clean up. She's been consistently wearing panties during the day. I've even begun to allow her to wear them when we're going out. She's been doing that well with telling me she has to go.
Yesterday my mom and I went out to run some errands. We were near the mall and it was time for Andelise to eat. I decided it would be nice for Jaycie if she could play at the playplace while Ande ate.
Jaycie was enjoying playing because nobody was at the playplace (the more kids, the more shy she decides she is). I wasn't really thinking about how long it had been since I had her go to the bathroom last until I saw her standing there with liquid forming underneath her! She stopped going when I told her to and my mom cleaned things up and took her to the bathroom. I blamed it partly on myself because I didn't have her go to the bathroom prior to playing.
Later in the day, she was playing outside and told me she needed to come in and go potty. I thought to myself about the progress that revealed. That's when I realized she went up to her bedroom and got new panties for herself. She had had an accident outside. I suppose if she's going to have an accident, that's the best place for it.
All these accidents seem to happen during the baby's feedings. I need to do a better job of making sure she's been to the bathroom in the recent past before I feed the baby. Especially because she had another accident after Nikelle got home. Again, while I was feeding her sister.
I was sitting with Ande when Nikelle came up to me and said, "I think Jaycie had an accident." I put the baby down and went to the bathroom where the floor was soaked. When I asked Jaycie why she didn't tell me, her response was simply "I just wet."
After informing my daughter that there would be no more candy while she was having accidents during the day, she did better to this point. I
Thinking about it, t's been a while since she's been to the bathroom...
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