I receive an e-mail from FamilyLife entitled Moments with You. They are very encouraging e-mails. As I was clearing out my inbox, I came across this one that I felt was to good not to share!
The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” (Genesis 2:23 NIV)
I’m telling you—men just have it easier. Here are some examples someone sent me. When you’re a man . . .
• Your last name stays put.
• The garage is all yours.
• Wedding plans take care of themselves.
• You can never be pregnant.
• Wrinkles add character.
• The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
• You’ve got one mood all the time. Usually.
• Phone conversations are over in thirty seconds flat.
• A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
• You can open all your own jars.
• You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. Usually.
• If someone forgets to invite you somewhere, he can still be your friend.
• Your underwear is $8.95—for a three-pack!
• The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
• You only have to shave your face and neck.
• You can play with toys all your life.
• One wallet and one pair of shoes—one color for all seasons.
• You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
• You can “do” your nails with a pocket knife
See what I mean? So the next time your wife seems too complicated for you, be patient with her. You didn’t marry a man. You married her because she is different.
Realize that her life comes with a lot of stuff you don’t have to put up with. Take the time to genuinely listen and understand because God created her as a gift for you.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Mealtime prayers
I’ve never really been great at implementing mealtime prayers. I’ve asked friends for their ideas on praying at the dinner table, but after utilizing their suggestions for a couple of days, I find myself simply longing for a moment of peace I know will come once food is set before my whining children. When my husband is home and we sit down as a family for dinner, he often prays (as my dad did when I was growing up). Every now and then, my husband will ask our children if they want to pray.
One day, our 4-year-old said she wanted to pray and quoted a Bible verse she had learned. “Give thanks to the Lord… who made the great lights… sun… moon and stars...” (Psalm 136:3, 7-9) “Evening, morning, and noon I cry out…” (Psalm 55:17) is another verse my preschooler prays from her heart to God before we eat. This expression of gratitude to God fills my heart as the prayers fill our home.
It can be a lot of fun to recall Bible verses on thanksgiving to offer God at the table. Although we do not use this routine continually, I am grateful my children can recall verses they have hid in their hearts when we do. Today my daughter recalled another Bible verse about the wise men. “When they saw star, they were overjoyed!” (Matthew 2:10) It may not be a prayer of thanksgiving but I believe these moments given the expression God is looking for.
One day, our 4-year-old said she wanted to pray and quoted a Bible verse she had learned. “Give thanks to the Lord… who made the great lights… sun… moon and stars...” (Psalm 136:3, 7-9) “Evening, morning, and noon I cry out…” (Psalm 55:17) is another verse my preschooler prays from her heart to God before we eat. This expression of gratitude to God fills my heart as the prayers fill our home.
It can be a lot of fun to recall Bible verses on thanksgiving to offer God at the table. Although we do not use this routine continually, I am grateful my children can recall verses they have hid in their hearts when we do. Today my daughter recalled another Bible verse about the wise men. “When they saw star, they were overjoyed!” (Matthew 2:10) It may not be a prayer of thanksgiving but I believe these moments given the expression God is looking for.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Mom's Pizza
At least once a week, we could count on mom to prepare homemade pizza. After we helped roll out the floured dough for our meal, we were allowed to spread the tomato sauce as mom added the necessary seasonings. The highlight was adding layers of cheese followed by pulling pieces off of a roll of breakfast sausage to achieve our meat topping. As we added the mushrooms, I could never resist eating them straight from the can between placing them on top of the pizza.
I didn’t think there was anything unique about my mom’s pizza back then. Looking back now, I recall so much more. Tomatoes from the garden’s harvest filled buckets and covered counters as they waited to join those boiling on the stove. The aroma left me craving the moment I could satisfy my taste buds with Mom’s homemade sauce.
The work that I now know goes into that kind of task makes me question the reasoning behind the amount of effort involved. Mom’s homemade sauce spoke of her love for my dad as she supported his hobby of gardening and enjoying the harvest. Allowing us to assist in the preparation of the meal was one way she spoke love to her children as well.
In our family, take-out pizza will never measure up to Mom’s. As I watch my children’s excitement in helping create this tradition handed down from my childhood, I am convinced that the memories created help leave the lasting savor in my mouth.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
What I would say to my Dad today, April 27, 2010
Dear Dad,
Today is your birthday. This year, as with the past couple, however, your birthday does not beckon a celebration. I have no reason to enter a Hallmark shop and look through the cards to find that perfect one that would make you cry. (I always knew it was the right card when I achieved my treasured result.) There is no reason for the family to gather. It serves no purpose to excite my girls with exclamations over what this date means to me. And yet, I know there is still much to celebrate in this life.
My heart hurts to realize this letter can never get to you. At the same time, I really have no idea what kind of moments God allows you to witness there in Heaven. I have no idea what type of experiences He gives you the privilege of knowing you played a part in. Somewhere in my heart, I hope He gives you glimpses of the joys here on this earth. I realize no joy here can compare to what is there. There are so many moments with your granddaughters I long for you to be a part of. Nikelle still creates smiles on the faces of others just because she extends love unconditionally. And every time she does, the little jingle you borrowed from Sara Lee runs through my head. Jaycie is extremely shy in groups of people but if you catch her at just the right moment, she is so terribly goofy. I can almost hear your laugh as I watch her and I think that laugh would encourage her to continue in her goofball ways. Andelise will point to your picture on the refrigerator identifying you as “Papa” and, for a brief moment, I will forget that you have never known her as she has never known you. Her fearless ways would make you concerned for her safety and yet I think you would learn to appreciate, as we have, her little stunts. She is just our little gymnast and athlete who wants to be included in everything her big sisters do.
58 years ago, God brought you into this world. For almost 56 years, you had the opportunity to impact those around you. You and Mom chose one another and welcomed the birth of four children who you would attempt to pass the baton to. Now today, more than two years after you left our world, I realize how very much your life impacts me still.
After your death, I was forced to face things in my world I had never faced before. Oh sure, there were the minor house repairs that I would want to pick up the phone to have you quickly fix. There have been the family gatherings where there is no longer great joy in wondering if the meal I prepare will leave you satisfied after you’ve mounted your plate high before you sit down at the table. There have been the trips to the zoo and the farm where I find my heart aching that you are not around to smile and laugh and comment on the kids’ reactions to different moments. Yes, there are plenty of things in my life that have required adjusting since your death.
The biggest adjustments have been those within my own heart. I never knew how much pain and anger I stored within myself. It all came to a climax after your death. I found myself eating for comfort until my clothes didn’t fit anymore. My emotions continually exploded with the force of a volcano at every little disruption in my life. Witnessing all of this has caused me to do some serious soul searching. I most certainly do not want to continue causing unnecessary pain to those I love or even myself for that matter.
The question of what is truly important to me has been nagging at my soul. I do a lot of talking and lip service to those things I treasure in my life. Still, I don’t believe my actions have been confirming much of my talk. I finally think I am on the right path. There is a long journey ahead of me but with the help of so many people, and mainly from God, I am experiencing real change.
Your death has left me asking what I want my own husband and children to remember about me should my life end unexpectedly. I have come to the conclusion that I was not living a legacy that would be worth leaving behind. Back in high school, while I was visiting some friends in Indiana, I came across the lyrics to a song by Philips, Craig and Dean entitled “Will You Love Jesus More?” I’ve always wanted that song to be a tribute to my own life and yet after all these years I believe I am only brushing the surface of that desire.
You may not be here anymore to influence me on a daily basis. My baby will never have the privilege of knowing how very special the word “Papa” is. I will likely continue to long every day for you to still be here with us and sadness will probably always remind me of your absence. And yet, your death has changed me for the better – more than I could have ever imagined possible.
For so many years, I longed to live my life to please you. I desired your approval. I pined for your affection. Today, I realize that I life is more about living for the approval of my Heavenly Father. God, himself, is really the only thing that satisfies.
I am so grateful to you and mom for introducing Him to me and impressing upon me the importance of a relationship with Him. We had no way of knowing that I would be forced to rely on Him in this way. Somehow, because of what you passed on to me, I knew to cling tightly to my Lord and Savior.
For some reason, now that you are in heaven, eternity is more tangible for me. Eternity has always been the hope I clung to and even still, just differently. The promises God has left in the Bible are what I live and breathe each day.
I just thought you should know the impact your life and your death have had on me.
With love,
Trist
Today is your birthday. This year, as with the past couple, however, your birthday does not beckon a celebration. I have no reason to enter a Hallmark shop and look through the cards to find that perfect one that would make you cry. (I always knew it was the right card when I achieved my treasured result.) There is no reason for the family to gather. It serves no purpose to excite my girls with exclamations over what this date means to me. And yet, I know there is still much to celebrate in this life.
My heart hurts to realize this letter can never get to you. At the same time, I really have no idea what kind of moments God allows you to witness there in Heaven. I have no idea what type of experiences He gives you the privilege of knowing you played a part in. Somewhere in my heart, I hope He gives you glimpses of the joys here on this earth. I realize no joy here can compare to what is there. There are so many moments with your granddaughters I long for you to be a part of. Nikelle still creates smiles on the faces of others just because she extends love unconditionally. And every time she does, the little jingle you borrowed from Sara Lee runs through my head. Jaycie is extremely shy in groups of people but if you catch her at just the right moment, she is so terribly goofy. I can almost hear your laugh as I watch her and I think that laugh would encourage her to continue in her goofball ways. Andelise will point to your picture on the refrigerator identifying you as “Papa” and, for a brief moment, I will forget that you have never known her as she has never known you. Her fearless ways would make you concerned for her safety and yet I think you would learn to appreciate, as we have, her little stunts. She is just our little gymnast and athlete who wants to be included in everything her big sisters do.
58 years ago, God brought you into this world. For almost 56 years, you had the opportunity to impact those around you. You and Mom chose one another and welcomed the birth of four children who you would attempt to pass the baton to. Now today, more than two years after you left our world, I realize how very much your life impacts me still.
After your death, I was forced to face things in my world I had never faced before. Oh sure, there were the minor house repairs that I would want to pick up the phone to have you quickly fix. There have been the family gatherings where there is no longer great joy in wondering if the meal I prepare will leave you satisfied after you’ve mounted your plate high before you sit down at the table. There have been the trips to the zoo and the farm where I find my heart aching that you are not around to smile and laugh and comment on the kids’ reactions to different moments. Yes, there are plenty of things in my life that have required adjusting since your death.
The biggest adjustments have been those within my own heart. I never knew how much pain and anger I stored within myself. It all came to a climax after your death. I found myself eating for comfort until my clothes didn’t fit anymore. My emotions continually exploded with the force of a volcano at every little disruption in my life. Witnessing all of this has caused me to do some serious soul searching. I most certainly do not want to continue causing unnecessary pain to those I love or even myself for that matter.
The question of what is truly important to me has been nagging at my soul. I do a lot of talking and lip service to those things I treasure in my life. Still, I don’t believe my actions have been confirming much of my talk. I finally think I am on the right path. There is a long journey ahead of me but with the help of so many people, and mainly from God, I am experiencing real change.
Your death has left me asking what I want my own husband and children to remember about me should my life end unexpectedly. I have come to the conclusion that I was not living a legacy that would be worth leaving behind. Back in high school, while I was visiting some friends in Indiana, I came across the lyrics to a song by Philips, Craig and Dean entitled “Will You Love Jesus More?” I’ve always wanted that song to be a tribute to my own life and yet after all these years I believe I am only brushing the surface of that desire.
You may not be here anymore to influence me on a daily basis. My baby will never have the privilege of knowing how very special the word “Papa” is. I will likely continue to long every day for you to still be here with us and sadness will probably always remind me of your absence. And yet, your death has changed me for the better – more than I could have ever imagined possible.
For so many years, I longed to live my life to please you. I desired your approval. I pined for your affection. Today, I realize that I life is more about living for the approval of my Heavenly Father. God, himself, is really the only thing that satisfies.
I am so grateful to you and mom for introducing Him to me and impressing upon me the importance of a relationship with Him. We had no way of knowing that I would be forced to rely on Him in this way. Somehow, because of what you passed on to me, I knew to cling tightly to my Lord and Savior.
For some reason, now that you are in heaven, eternity is more tangible for me. Eternity has always been the hope I clung to and even still, just differently. The promises God has left in the Bible are what I live and breathe each day.
I just thought you should know the impact your life and your death have had on me.
With love,
Trist
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Lost and Consumed
I can easily be consumed over just about anything. When I lose something, however, there is little that can distract me from searching for the lost item. This has been the story over the past few days.
Jewelry is not something you find adorning my body very often. I wear a watch (for running) and my wedding ring (it is actually an anniversary band we purchased on our 5th anniversary). Every now and then I will wear a necklace and on a rare occasion, a bracelet.
This being said, it is not a big shock that almost immediately when I get in the house, all jewelry comes off. This includes my watch and ring. I often hook my ring onto the band of the watch so that it won’t be quite so easy to lose. I then set my watch and ring combo on the kitchen counter, the microwave, the bathroom mirror or place it in the pocket of my bag that I carry everywhere.
I only notice that I am not wearing my watch and ring when I leave the house for some reason. Monday night, as I ran out the door for a meeting, I did a quick glance at the kitchen counter but did not see them. I figured they were probably in my bag but couldn’t find them as I looked prior to the meeting. I wasn’t too worried.
On Tuesday, as I left the house to take my daughter to school, I checked the kitchen counter and microwave for my ring. Unable to place them, I became a little more concerned. Still, I figured it would turn up when I actually spent the time organizing and looking for it.
Tuesday night, I met my girlfriend for a walk/run. I really wanted my watch to time the intervals we’d be doing but still could not find them. I came home from the run and searched my bag again. I opened every zipper, took out every item and put everything back in. I searched my bathroom, my bedroom and the kitchen to no avail. Frustrated, I drowned my emotions in a box of crackers with some cheese. This was only a temporary solution, and not a good one at that.
I went to bed praying and woke up the next morning determined not to find comfort in food but rather give it all over to God. My prayer was that He would help me find the watch and ring.
My mind was scattered. I did not recall taking them off anywhere outside of the house but I did my best to retrace my steps over the weekend. I searched by the computer because I had gone straight to check my e-mail when I got home both Saturday night and Sunday morning. They were not there. Was it possible that they could have fallen out of my bag somewhere as I was out and about and fell out of the van? I even went to Jewel-Osco on the slim hope that someone may have found them and turned them in. Nope. I was really losing my mind.
I searched the toy box (getting rid of some stuffed animals in the process) in hopes that I had set them somewhere within the baby’s reach. I figured she could have easily taken them and put them somewhere. As I cleaned my house, I remembered what I had worn Saturday and Sunday and decided it wouldn’t hurt to check the pockets. My husband had already washed my jeans. (He’s great with helping with the household chores!) I dug through the hamper for my sweatshirt and yelled! For some bizarre reason, I chose to put my watch and ring in my sweatshirt pocket! Whoo-hoo! I felt so light-hearted and it made me think.
Besides asking God to help me find the lost items, I had prayed that He would keep me from being completely consumed with finding them. I continually prayed giving it over to Him again and again. I knew if they had fallen out of my bag somewhere outside of the house, they were gone with no hope of finding them again. Worrying about it would do no good. I also knew that if they were in the house somewhere, eventually they would show up. I prayed that He would help me remember to turn to Him for comfort and direction rather than eat away my worries.
I had a girlfriend call me last minute to come over for a spur of the moment visit. This gave me other things to think about. It took me outside of myself. I went out and got my haircut as my mom watched the girls. I took a book and found myself easily lost in the story. My mind returned to the items I lost as soon as I left but I believe God was teaching me through it all.
I get so totally consumed with finding material items that I’ve lost. I can be distracted here and there but overall, my mind does not let up. So many different things consume me and they’re not good. They serve no positive purpose.
What would happen in my life if I allowed God to consume my thoughts and actions the way this experience has? I believe God is working to teach me this these days. I’m thankful not just that I found my watch and ring. I’m truly grateful that God is far more satisfying than anything else I allow to consume me.
Jewelry is not something you find adorning my body very often. I wear a watch (for running) and my wedding ring (it is actually an anniversary band we purchased on our 5th anniversary). Every now and then I will wear a necklace and on a rare occasion, a bracelet.
This being said, it is not a big shock that almost immediately when I get in the house, all jewelry comes off. This includes my watch and ring. I often hook my ring onto the band of the watch so that it won’t be quite so easy to lose. I then set my watch and ring combo on the kitchen counter, the microwave, the bathroom mirror or place it in the pocket of my bag that I carry everywhere.
I only notice that I am not wearing my watch and ring when I leave the house for some reason. Monday night, as I ran out the door for a meeting, I did a quick glance at the kitchen counter but did not see them. I figured they were probably in my bag but couldn’t find them as I looked prior to the meeting. I wasn’t too worried.
On Tuesday, as I left the house to take my daughter to school, I checked the kitchen counter and microwave for my ring. Unable to place them, I became a little more concerned. Still, I figured it would turn up when I actually spent the time organizing and looking for it.
Tuesday night, I met my girlfriend for a walk/run. I really wanted my watch to time the intervals we’d be doing but still could not find them. I came home from the run and searched my bag again. I opened every zipper, took out every item and put everything back in. I searched my bathroom, my bedroom and the kitchen to no avail. Frustrated, I drowned my emotions in a box of crackers with some cheese. This was only a temporary solution, and not a good one at that.
I went to bed praying and woke up the next morning determined not to find comfort in food but rather give it all over to God. My prayer was that He would help me find the watch and ring.
My mind was scattered. I did not recall taking them off anywhere outside of the house but I did my best to retrace my steps over the weekend. I searched by the computer because I had gone straight to check my e-mail when I got home both Saturday night and Sunday morning. They were not there. Was it possible that they could have fallen out of my bag somewhere as I was out and about and fell out of the van? I even went to Jewel-Osco on the slim hope that someone may have found them and turned them in. Nope. I was really losing my mind.
I searched the toy box (getting rid of some stuffed animals in the process) in hopes that I had set them somewhere within the baby’s reach. I figured she could have easily taken them and put them somewhere. As I cleaned my house, I remembered what I had worn Saturday and Sunday and decided it wouldn’t hurt to check the pockets. My husband had already washed my jeans. (He’s great with helping with the household chores!) I dug through the hamper for my sweatshirt and yelled! For some bizarre reason, I chose to put my watch and ring in my sweatshirt pocket! Whoo-hoo! I felt so light-hearted and it made me think.
Besides asking God to help me find the lost items, I had prayed that He would keep me from being completely consumed with finding them. I continually prayed giving it over to Him again and again. I knew if they had fallen out of my bag somewhere outside of the house, they were gone with no hope of finding them again. Worrying about it would do no good. I also knew that if they were in the house somewhere, eventually they would show up. I prayed that He would help me remember to turn to Him for comfort and direction rather than eat away my worries.
I had a girlfriend call me last minute to come over for a spur of the moment visit. This gave me other things to think about. It took me outside of myself. I went out and got my haircut as my mom watched the girls. I took a book and found myself easily lost in the story. My mind returned to the items I lost as soon as I left but I believe God was teaching me through it all.
I get so totally consumed with finding material items that I’ve lost. I can be distracted here and there but overall, my mind does not let up. So many different things consume me and they’re not good. They serve no positive purpose.
What would happen in my life if I allowed God to consume my thoughts and actions the way this experience has? I believe God is working to teach me this these days. I’m thankful not just that I found my watch and ring. I’m truly grateful that God is far more satisfying than anything else I allow to consume me.
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