He Knows My Name

Triumph.

Defined as "a great victory or achievement", this is not a word we use very often.

Honestly, most days don't leave me feeling very triumphant.

We're searching for money trees these days. It seems every inch of our home demands our prompt attention. Not just the minor problems but serious issues like windows leaking into walls. How does one not worry about where that kind of money will come from?

The dishes confiscate every inch of the counters... again. Laundry conceals our floors, leaving us feeling like we are buried alive. I can't walk into the kids' bedrooms without stepping over toys and papers and who knows what else. I swear I just spent a day in their room digging out and organizing... what happened?

Last year I completed two half marathons. This year, I can't catch my breath carrying laundry up the stairs. Not to mention the bathroom scale reveals the truth that I am far from a healthy weight. As if it wasn't bad enough that my jeans already squeeze my body like a tube of toothpaste?

I'm not saving money.

I'm not losing weight.

I don't have any great accomplishments on my list right now (nor am I in pursuit of any).

So how exactly do I love my triumphs? Now I feel like I can't even participate in the Hearts at Home Blog Hop!

I watched from the front window as our youngest daughter waved goodbye to her daddy. He was taking our oldest to the bus stop on his way to work the other day. I was overwhelmed with an odd feeling. Somehow, Some way, God put it in my heart to choose this man. It hasn't always been easy. Many a times I had thought about quitting. Sometimes I still wonder what's the point? Yet in this simple action of witnessing my husband being a father, I felt triumph.

My man is worthy of respect.

My girls know they are loved by their daddy.

I know I am loved by my husband. (I may not feel it all the time but deep in my heart... I know.)

This isn't my victory but it still leaves me feeling triumphant. The success of our marriage is God's achievement. The fact that He grabbed a hold of our hearts a long time ago... that was Him; not us. God gave us a blueprint for our lives and by choosing it, our marriage will last. Three beautiful girls. Extended family that celebrates with us (and mourns with us). A community of Christ-followers that do life with us. Bountiful friends that remain faithful through it all. There may not be a list of achievements I can rattle off; but triumph I know.

I listened to the lyrics of a song as I drove the other day. It's a song that I've heard many times. But this time, the words grabbed a hold of my heart. The song He Knows My Name by Francesca Battistelli wraps up my feelings on triumph.

"I don't need my name in lights
I'm famous in my Father's eyes
Make no mistake
He knows my name
I'm not living for applause
I'm already so adored
It's all His stage
He knows my name"

Sometimes I just want to be noticed for something. I want to achieve; to feel a sense of accomplishment. Yet loving my triumphs has nothing to do with anything I do.

My triumph is in God and His work in my life. I don't need to be a super model. My life doesn't have to feel like I'm walking on easy street. The days can feel hard at times and yet deep in my soul, I can still feel triumphant.

I'm famous in my Father's eyes...

I'm not living for applause...

I'm already so adored...

It's all His stage...

and He knows my name.

That is something to be triumphant about.

He knows my name.

(The Third Thursday of the month is the Hearts at Home Blog Hop! This month's topic: Love Your Triumphs. Head over to Jill's blog to see what other women have to say on the topic.)