Disappointed

Disappointment is so rampant in my life. It occurs numerous times on a daily basis. I feel like I walk around discouraged and defeated. When will I ever learn my lesson?

Quite often, I inform my husband that I would do so much better living the Christian life if only I could eliminate people. Of course, I follow up my comment with a laugh because I know that is impossible. I wouldn't be living if I weren't surrounded by others. God created us for relationships.

I am tired of hurting, though. That is the reason I want to give up. I want to quit loving at times. When I open my heart to people, it is more than likely that it will get broken. No one is perfect. So why do I find it such a shock every time I am pained by someone I've invested my life in?

Some days I just feel alone. Reality is that I have people who love me and care about my feelings. It is just that their actions or neglect leave me curling up in the fetal position in an attempt to escape the pain. All too often, I focus on the source of my pain.

I have just joined an online study on the book, A Confident Heart, by Renee Swope. In the first chapter alone, I have found so much encouragement. In particular, the quote of Isaiah 49:23 reminded me of why my outlook on relationships gets so askew.

"Those who hope in me will not be disappointed." Hope in Him. My eyes too easily come off of God. I look to my husband for hope. Disappointment. I look to my children for hope. Disappointment. My extended family. My friends. Even the church. Disappoint. Disappoint. Disappoint. "Those who trust in me will not be disappointed."

Sounds like a promise of truth to cling to. Especially when I'm feeling  let down by this world. Trust in God. He doesn't disappoint.