I sat on the park bench fighting my natural tendency to judge. Invited for a play date, we discussed our mothering stories. As the tales of others were weaved in to our conversation, the temptation to fit each one into my own little box was irresistible.
Every child should
have a consistent early bedtime.
Families shouldn't
fill their schedules to a level of crazy.
There are laws for
children riding in vehicles. It's simple really: follow the rules.
I had to tell myself
to STOP.
I am a mom to three beautiful little girls. Each one is very
different. My opinions on mothering have changed drastically in the eleven
years I've been doing this job.
Early on in my life, before I even earned the title of
"mommy", it was my belief that I knew well how to raise children. Not
just my own (who would come in the future) but those of others as well. When my
compliant, laid-back firstborn entered the world, my parenting philosophies
were reinforced.
I rocked at
motherhood.
I knew what I was
doing.
Others apparently did not.
Maybe they just needed
a good example.
Then daughter #2 came into our life.
And now we have 3! (With each daughter added to our family,
their personalities morphed to reveal a little more of myself.)
Oh, how I wish I
could apologize to each and every mother I ever frowned upon!
It is one of my high hopes that others do not judge me.
After all, I now know that I am failing miserably as a mom. My heartfelt prayer is that God will work
in spite of all my mistakes. No longer do I believe Mother knows best.
(Although that is a line from a song from the Disney movie, Tangled. I love to
sing it to my girls. The same line. Over and over again.)
Here's my new parenting philosophy: God gave my children
their personalities. It is my responsibility to help shape them into the well-adjusted
adult He designed them to be. (Or not-so-well-adjusted because I've sent them
running to a counselor's office. My husband says we will screw them up. He encourages me that it's all about damage
control.). Really, much of it is beyond my control. Ultimately, God gave me
these children to sharpen my rough edges. I believe He desires to transform me
through my children.
For that reason (along with Jill Savage's book, No More Perfect Moms), I've decided to Knock it Off! I will actually verbally tell myself to "Stop judging
others." "My way is not the only way." (And there are many other
phrases of the sort.)
Yes, I actually talk to myself. I realize that may cause you
to judge me. I'm just hoping you'll agree to Knock it Off as well.
I’ve signed the Knock It Off commitment. Will you?
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