Christmas and Tears

On the ride home last night, I heard the lyrics to a song I don't believe I've heard before. It applied to my heart this year.

I think of loved ones who’ve passed away
And I pray their resting in a better place
I think of memories of years gone by
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

I think of soldiers across the sea
Sometimes I wonder its them instead of me
For my freedom they give their lives
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

Tears of thankfulness, tears of hope
I cry tears of joy at Christmas cause I know
There is peace on earth for every heart to find
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

I think of families, I think of home
And say a prayer for those who spend this time alone
Cause love can reach out into a silent night
And that’s why Christmas makes me cry

Tears of thankfulness, tears of hope
I cry tears of joy at Christmas cause I know
There is peace on earth for every heart to find
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

I think of Mary and the virgin birth
And I’m amazed at how much God thinks we’re worth
That He would send His only Son to die
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

Tears of thankfulness, tears of hope
I cry tears of joy at Christmas cause I know
There is peace on earth for every heart to find
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

This morning I cried. Dad's chair will be empty at the breakfast table this morning. Rod's dad won't greet us with herring, cheese, sardines and hardtack Christmas morning. There are clouds overshadowing Andelise's first Christmas. We are going to have to be intentional about focusing on the true meaning of Christmas as well as on our kids so that the floodgates of tears don't pour open these next couple of days.

It will be easy to focus on the sadness. I'm a traditionalist and if you've been following my blog, you know how important traditions are to me. Dad set up a lot of traditions. This year we're breaking many of them. Well, maybe breaking isn't a great word. Starting new ones. Things are different. In order to cope, we are starting new traditions this year. It's going to be some difficult days now as the busyness of preparation is over and Christmas is here.

I take comfort in knowing that God came near. He became human for us. Immanuel. He understands every pain we endure. Jesus wept. He knows what it is like to lose somebody we love.

A moment like this

Yesterday I held my baby girl while she slept for two hours. It was a wonderful feeling to snuggle with this little creation of God.

Got me thinking.

What is wrong with this life that more often than not things keep me too busy from moments like these.

I really would like to have a goal to be more intentional in the coming year to have more moments like these.

Current Book Read - Heaven by Randy Alcorn

"You are made for a person and a place. Jesus is the person. Heaven is the place. They are a package -- you cannot get Heaven without Jesus or Jesus without Heaven." - Randy Alcorn, Heaven

"See the Lord while He may be found; call on Him while He is near." - Isaiah 55:6

He does exist!

I decided that since it's been over a year since I started this blog, I should probably get a picture of Rod & I up. It's not that my husband isn't important to me, it's just that we didn't really have any pictures handy on the computer to post.

So, there he is to the right. It's last September when he threw me that surprise 30th birthday party a couple of months early. Truly, one of my fondest memories!

December Craziness

It's December 14th already? Truly, it seems as though December, in particular, is a balancing act. How much can you fit into a day and how can you prioritize it to make certain every minute counts? There are deadlines to be met. Every day is a countdown to a Christmas gathering or Christmas day itself. We attempt to see how little sleep we can get by on so we can cram just a little more into the day. It's necessary to pay attention to the food we eat so we aren't mindlessly adding to our waistline. I've heard that "the average American will gain at least five pounds of body fat during the holidays". I certainly don't want to be average or above average in this case. Balance during this season is extremely difficult to find.

Yesterday was one of those days where I had crammed too much into the previous week, was lacking sleep and ate like there was no tomorrow. Today, I feel rested. (I wonder if that could be related to actually going to sleep at a decent hour?) Because I have that restfulness, I don't feel as much stress. I do, however, feel "blah" from my eating binge yesterday. My joints all feel swollen from the water retention resulting from all the salty foods I inhaled. My mouth feels like I can't possibly drink enough water to satisfy my thrist and the scale says I put on that five pounds of holiday fat in one day! In all seriousness, I know I didn't gain five pounds yesterday. One day of eating right will correct the scale to bring it a little closer to reality.

Today, I'm going to make certain I get some rest again. I cannot possibly get through another week without it. I'm going to eat healthy. My focus is to get five fruits and/or vegetables in today and track what I eat while I am certain to drink enough glasses of water. And last, but certainly not least, I am going to ask God for help through my day. Why is it so easy to prioritize Him right out of our lives when things get busy even though He should be at the top of the list?

This season is supposed to be about God. I need to be certain I don't forget Him or intentionally push Him aside.