The wake for Dad Carlson will be held on Sunday from 2-8 at Kurtz Memorial in Frankfort (same place my dad was waked). The funeral will be Monday at 10:30 at the same location.
Thank you for all the prayers and condolences.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Peace in the Pain
2008 has been a difficult year. It's hard to believe that just three months ago we said goodbye to my dad as we have now had to say goodbye to Rod's dad. I never would have imagined that we would be in this stage of life at this moment. Still, if there's one thing we all know, it's that life never goes as we have planned.
The biggest gift we've been given recently has been the extra week we were given with Rod's dad. It was truly a miracle which allowed Rod to have specific conversations with his dad that he was longing for. It also allowed us to look back on the final days of his life with peace.
That's the greatest thing about both of these experiences with our dads. The final days of their lives were spent at home surrounded by their families. I couldn't think of a much better way to go when you have to go with such a terrible disease. There is great peace as we look back on both of these moments with our dads.
One thing we're attempting to do is to explain everything fully to the girls. We brought the girls back to the house later in the evening so they could see the body leave the house. My mom and Rod's mom both chose to keep the body at the house for a longer period of time than is common for most. There is actually a comfort to having their body in the house - even though we know they are no longer present with us. When the body is taken there is a finality that breaks the heart. Even so, we feel it important for our girls to see that moment to understand we are saying goodbye. I hope our choices during these times will make it a bit easier to cope with future experiences of facing death.
In times like these when pain continually stabs the heart, there is an overwhelming peace that comes with being able to say goodbye the way we did.
1 Thessalonians 4
Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words.
The biggest gift we've been given recently has been the extra week we were given with Rod's dad. It was truly a miracle which allowed Rod to have specific conversations with his dad that he was longing for. It also allowed us to look back on the final days of his life with peace.
That's the greatest thing about both of these experiences with our dads. The final days of their lives were spent at home surrounded by their families. I couldn't think of a much better way to go when you have to go with such a terrible disease. There is great peace as we look back on both of these moments with our dads.
One thing we're attempting to do is to explain everything fully to the girls. We brought the girls back to the house later in the evening so they could see the body leave the house. My mom and Rod's mom both chose to keep the body at the house for a longer period of time than is common for most. There is actually a comfort to having their body in the house - even though we know they are no longer present with us. When the body is taken there is a finality that breaks the heart. Even so, we feel it important for our girls to see that moment to understand we are saying goodbye. I hope our choices during these times will make it a bit easier to cope with future experiences of facing death.
In times like these when pain continually stabs the heart, there is an overwhelming peace that comes with being able to say goodbye the way we did.
1 Thessalonians 4
Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words.
Monday, May 26, 2008
Goodbye, Dad Carlson
A little earlier today, we said goodbye to Rod's dad. It's the first time I was present when the life actually left someone's body. He smiled before he went - just about the finish of the National Anthem of the Cubs game. We'll miss him a lot but look forward to being united again one day.
Nikelle responded with all emotion flooding. I had to take her away from the house simply because she wasn't able to cope. I think the emotions she did not display when my dad died piled up top of the one's she's experiencing now.
Goodbye, Dad Carlson. You are loved much.
Nikelle responded with all emotion flooding. I had to take her away from the house simply because she wasn't able to cope. I think the emotions she did not display when my dad died piled up top of the one's she's experiencing now.
Goodbye, Dad Carlson. You are loved much.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Seeking the Passion
I've been struggling with the word miracles and healing lately. The end result of cancer with my dad, I'm certain, is the main reason for my quandry. Even now, staring in the face of a miracle my heart is still lacking passion and excitement. The facts are all there in my head. I believe it all. My heart is lacking.
Yesterday the hospice nurses came to the house for Dad Carlson. They were among the rest of us in their amazement of his condition. He was on death's door on Friday. Honestly, we did not expect him to be alive today. Every day is a gift with him. There is no timeframe to give for the remainder of his life. It could be days. It could be much longer. He has a bacteria in his blood that is working to destroy his organs along with the cancer his body has fought against for so long. This is bonus time that has been given to us by God. Nothing short of a miracle.
Shouldn't this ignite my heart once again? Shouldn't I begin to feel the passion I once experienced in my life as God continues to show Himself even throughout these dark times?
My heart is still filled with so much confusion and I lack passion. I'm referring to the deep passion that ignites my heart and sets me on fire to give me purpose for this life we live.
So I continue on. As I continue to seek God, He reveals Himself to me. He promises to so I will continue to cling to what I've been taught; what I know; what is true.
Proverbs 8:17 - "I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me."
Matthew 7:8 - "For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."
Yesterday the hospice nurses came to the house for Dad Carlson. They were among the rest of us in their amazement of his condition. He was on death's door on Friday. Honestly, we did not expect him to be alive today. Every day is a gift with him. There is no timeframe to give for the remainder of his life. It could be days. It could be much longer. He has a bacteria in his blood that is working to destroy his organs along with the cancer his body has fought against for so long. This is bonus time that has been given to us by God. Nothing short of a miracle.
Shouldn't this ignite my heart once again? Shouldn't I begin to feel the passion I once experienced in my life as God continues to show Himself even throughout these dark times?
My heart is still filled with so much confusion and I lack passion. I'm referring to the deep passion that ignites my heart and sets me on fire to give me purpose for this life we live.
So I continue on. As I continue to seek God, He reveals Himself to me. He promises to so I will continue to cling to what I've been taught; what I know; what is true.
Proverbs 8:17 - "I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me."
Matthew 7:8 - "For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Dad Carlson Update 5-18-08
Once again today, Dad Carlson was alert and talkative. He was even asking for things to eat. Although he does not move from the hospital bed at all, it is nothing short of a miracle that he is still with us and responsive. We just take one day at a time and are anxious to hear what the hospice nurses say when they come tomorrow.
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